#LoveLifeProject: Fun in Pictures

Today I decided to write another installment for the #lovelifeproject! I have been a little forgetful about posting my pictures to Instagram with the hashtag, but I do remember to take them everyday and keep track of them all on my phone :) It is still one of my favorite things to do over the course of each day! Something small, cute, or funny happens, and I whip out my camera, snap a quick pic, and at the end of the week, I have a week full of love and happiness to look at to remind me of all the warm fuzzies that I felt that week. 

I love looking back at how the small moments really do make me so happy throughout the week. Such small things can bring such a big smile to my face! Like a cute German t-shirt from my hubby. Or sitting on the couch with my puppies. Or seeing a beautiful bouquet of my favorite flowers, tulips! I truly believe that taking part in the Love Life Project has helped me to be more aware of the small things in my everyday life that can make me happy. It reminds me to find the joy that comes from the little things in life :) 

To read more about the Love Life Project, you can  click here to read my previous post about it. 

Here are my #lovelifeproject pictures from the last two weeks.

March 19th

My 5th grade students made worm ecosystems. They actually have worms! They are so excited to write out a diary of what they are eating and what activities they are doing every time they observe them in science class!

March 20th

My poor hubby got his wedding ring stuck in the part of the couch that neither of us could reach! He had the drill out and everything! He worked for almost two hours to get that baby outta there! He loves me so much! #thecouchsurvived

March 21st

Don't you just love flower displays like this one? I especially love tulips, and these welcomed me into Whole Foods two weekends ago! Such beautiful colors, no?

Whole Foods also had this delicious loaded baked-potato pizza! It was a slice of heaven! I promise to get this recipe up on the blog this week! And I'll remember to tag you, Maja!

March 22nd

I am seriously loving my new Fasching t-shirt that Bjorn bought me! I am a sucker for anything with German writing on it! Peace, Love, and Pretzels!

Bjorn, Whitney, and Mark and their band The Stories killed it at 80's Pop Rocks! They played "Paradise City" by Gun N' Roses. A.ma.zing!!!

Here's the video:

And a link to their website: wearethestories.com

March 23rd

When I saw this picture, I was in love. I love cardinals. My dad loved cardinals. To read about my dad and his story with cancer, you can click on the "Why Blog" tab at the top of this page. I have heard that cardinals represent loved ones who have passed. When you see one, it means they're visiting you. I always see cardinals when I need to see one, you know? If I'm having a bad day or missing my dad. I know it's him telling me he's here.

March 24th

This just made me crack up laughing!!

March 25th

This makes me think of....

Yes, my baby. Whenever you want to hear it, I will tell you the story.

And I spent a lot of my spring break watching this lovely from my childhood! This show makes me laugh so hard!

March 26th

The puppies had their teeth cleaned over my spring break, so they were incredibly sleepy on Wednesday and Thursday sleeping off the anesthesia. 

While I sat with the puppies, I took a quiz and found out "I'm the King of New York"! Can't you picture me belting that one out?

March 27th

Then I found out Alex Wong was a Newsie! Totally awesome! I tagged him in an Instagram post and asked him if he wanted to go salsa dancing. He did not respond. :-/

March 28th

Does this need an explanation?

March 29th

Can you write this on a business card?

March 30th

 Today Rachael and I ate lunch at Panera. I noticed that the blow-up balloon thingy at Mattress Firm seemed a little tired. I think it was time for his lunch break too.

What has been making you Love Life this past week?

Love and happiness <3 Holly

What I've Learned from OCD: Nothing's Perfect, Except My Memories

My OCD has always told me that something is "out of place;" that something is "off;" that something is "not right." It drives me crazy. I can be sitting in my living room, looking at my beautiful floating shelves on the wall with books that my dad loved--his books about history and the presidents--knickknacks that I picked up from Germany, and Japanese and Russian antiquing finds. I'll look at that shelf and, instead of admiring the beautiful things that I love and remembering people and places that mean so much to me, I'll look at a picture frame that holds a beautiful wedding picture and wonder, how come it just doesn't look right. To me it looks crooked. It is turned slightly as is the frame sitting next to it; however, to me it is turned a tad bit too much. My OCD tells me, Get up and move the frame! It looks ridiculous! But I know that is my mind playing tricks on me. 

My mind tries to get me to feel the need to stand up from my warm couch and my puppies' snuggles to get up and turn a picture frame 20 degrees to the left because it just seems "off." Right now while I'm writing this, my eyes every so often are drawn to that picture frame. They are drawn there because in the back of my mind, my OCD is scratching at my eyeballs, making them turn and look at it. It's screaming, trying to force my limbs to get up and move. But I'm not listening. It's not easy, but I'm not listening. 

Once it starts it's gnawing at my brain, my heart starts to race a little, and I have to remind myself to take deep breaths. Sometimes I close my eyes and take the deeps breaths. It's not so bad anymore. I just chose not to look at the shelf until the anxiety it created dissipated. 

When I look at the frame, I still sometimes think to myself, That frame does look a really bad. I mean it makes everything look so messy. My heart may start to race. But I don't touch it because that would be giving in to my OCD. I'm not doing that anymore. I haven't been for awhile. It's not always easy. Even though I have been working at this for a long time, and I have lived with OCD all my life, stupid, crazy things still set off my OCD, like a "crooked" picture frame.

Today I was going through the mail, purging old junk mail, filing important documents, and setting aside things to deal with tomorrow. I realized that I had a birthday card sitting in our mail organizer and so did Bjorn. They were both just sitting there. They were from people we loved. They had written beautiful, sweet notes to us inside, and I was just letting them sit there on top of the TV in the mail organizer. 

Bjorn had set out his birthday card that he got in the mail from his mom at the beginning of the week. He can't stop talking about it because it was so sweet. The card has a beautiful image of a jazz band on the front; it's so Bjorn. He loves it so much, he set it in the middle of our mantle, displaying it with love and happiness. 

My mom always did this when I was little. She set all of our birthday cards out on our mantle at my house for each of my sisters' birthdays. It always made me feel so special. It was one little way to show how much she loved us and how much we were loved, to celebrate us on our special day. 

Seeing Bjorn continue this tradition from my mom unknowingly made me realize that I never do this anymore. I never have. Putting those cards up on the mantle make my OCD brain tell me that something seems "off." It throws everything off! Seriously, it is so bad! It looks messy and ridiculous! You're such a slob!" My OCD always jumps to conclusions and doesn't let up. 

Tonight I took those birthday cards and set them beside Bjorn's. They're beautiful. They were written with love. They make me happy. Tonight, again, I told my OCD brain to shut up. 

 s

Although my life with OCD has gotten much easier, I live with OCD every day. I wish I did not have OCD, but I do. I have learned to live with it. I cannot stop my brain from having the OCD thoughts it has, but I can control how I react to each thought and whether I compulse over them and react to them or not. This is my life now: silencing the thoughts and not acting on them.

I've realized over the years that my OCD has taken the focus off the little joys in my life like admiring my living room shelves. Everything on that shelf has a memory; I love collecting memories. And instead of looking at the bookend eagle at the top of the shelf and thinking of my grandpa reading me The Lorax, all I could think about was whether or not that damn picture frame looked straight. Tonight I have been staring at that bookshelf and the cards on my mantle and relishing in my memories. If I close my eyes tight enough, I almost feel as if I have ventured back in time.

To read more about my OCD and perfectionism, click here and here.

Love and happiness <3 Holly